Life’s unpredictability has given me a harsh reminder that often catches us off guard. I never imagined that I would have to bury my wife, instead of her outliving me, even though statistics suggest women tend to live longer than men. We usually tuck such thoughts away, ignoring the inevitable.
As a devout Christian, I’ve always known that someday the unforeseen and the untold would come to pass. This, combined with the inherent uncertainty of the world we live in, paints a grim picture on the horizon.
Human nature often leads us to evade these thoughts, turning a blind eye to the writing on the wall. Yet here I stand, confronted with life’s reality, and it seems like we humans are wired to neglect or avoid the “Til death do us part” syndrome now arriving faster than anticipated. What’s more, it has taken me entirely by surprise and off guard.
Little did I know that my wife’s frequent bouts of sickness were ominous signs, seemingly orchestrated to put an untimely end to her life.
In most cases, we turn to hospitals as a last resort when grappling with recurring, obstinate, and malignant ailments. Despite the anxiety and mistrust that the word “hospital” often invokes, especially in the midst of the ongoing threat of COVID-19 rearing its head again, we were fortunate to have been in and out of the hospital numerous times as she would recover and return home. However, this time, fate took a different turn.
And the day came. October 4, 2023, a Wednesday that will forever remain etched in my memory. A day when my beloved wife, sister, mother, and best friend departed from this world. It was a day that altered the course of my life, marking the end of her earthly journey.
In the midst of an intense battle between life and death, my dear wife displayed unwavering strength and courage. However, in the end, death prevailed as the ultimate arbiter of existence had the final say.
Her passing, while undeniably heart-wrenching, is not something I view with negativity; rather, I see it as a transition and a promotion to an eternal life in heaven.
One of the last sentiments she expressed the day before her departure revolved around her desire to regain control over her health decisions. She voiced the need to have the autonomy to make choices pertaining to her well-being.
While acknowledging that the decisions made on her behalf were well-intentioned, she longed for the power to chart her own course.
Her words resonated deeply within me, highlighting a profound truth: as we journey through life, there may come a time when others must step in to make decisions on our behalf when we are no longer able to do so. Her insight was poignant, but unfortunately, circumstances limited her ability to effect the changes no matter the degree of her desire to do so.
It was a sobering realization to witness the gradual decline of a once highly intelligent woman, becoming increasingly dependent and relegated to the back seat in the decision-making process concerning her life.
This experience underscored the fleeting nature of human vanity, a stark reminder that we often carry ourselves with an air of self-importance.
Throughout this trying period, a collective effort was made, with me and numerous dedicated healthcare professionals working tirelessly to ensure the best possible care for my beloved wife. Our shared goal was to navigate her journey with care, compassion, and unwavering commitment.
My dear, I have missed you in various ways. It almost brings me to tears whenever I remember how you were informing me about inclement weather. You set your clock alarm at nights as a second guide so that I’m not late to work. You were a superstar when it came to household provisions. You made sure I put on my CPAP whenever I took a nap or sleep.
With your sharp memory you remembered your siblings and close friends’ birthdays and sometimes we sang “happy birthday” to them on the phone. Even your Parents had long gone, you still recall their birthdays and how old they would have been if alive!
We celebrated our birthdays, Thanksgiving Day, and Christmas. Soon with this year going to an end, the Thanksgiving and Christmas are around the corner, and I’m already imagining how I would pass these days without you.
Thank you, my dear queen, my dear wife, sister, mother, and best friend. I look forward to meeting you someday to part no more.
Thanks for reading!